Onward, To The Great Unknown

After reading all of your blogs over the past few months I almost feel a guilty writing today’s update because it comes from a place of pure happiness.

Today was my wife’s cd10 “checkup” and while I can say we both went into the doctor’s office with high hopes, I think both of us were trying to keep our expectations in check. This cycle my wife was subjected to 5 days of Femara and then 75 unit shots of Follistim on cycle-days 5, 7, and 9. This treatment plan was not that different from last month, with just an extra shot added. Last time around you’ll remember that she had about 7 good-sized follicles, but when the doctor told us to “coast” they all shrunk, forcing us to cancel the cycle.

So, this morning we headed back into the ultrasound room. My wife dutifully sat without any pants on for about 15 minutes while I tried to stop myself from playing with the expensive medical equipment and held her pants. After a quick mixup from one of the techs that we’ve seen many times (my wife’s name is not Crystal, despite what who she thought was in the room), we were finally afford a look into what my wife’s insides have been up to for the past 10 days, and boy were we happy.

For the first time since we started this journey, my wife’s body decided to do what we wanted it to do. The tech found just two follicles, but they were some of the biggest we’ve seen so far, a 15mm one and an 18mm one. At first, the tech thought we would “trigger” tonight, and then do the IUI on Sunday. Seeing we’ve never triggered, let alone done an IUI we were both in a bit of a shock. I think we both said “huh, wait, tonight?” at her within 5 seconds, forcing her to backtrack and say she’ll talk with our PA.

After the tech left, my wife and I smiled, kissed, said a thank you to her ovaries, and tried to gather ourselves after the moment of giant excitement. We met with the nurse who told us that my wife would have to do a shot of Menapur tomorrow, then she’d use the trigger shot Sunday and we’d do the IUI on Tuesday. The nurses kindly told us when we were supposed to have sex (or baby-dance in infertility blog speak), told me when I was going to have to come in for my “donation” and generally seemed happy for us. My wife later told me I kept saying the word sex while the nurse kept using the word intercourse. I swear I don’t try to embarrass her, but sometimes I don’t even realize I do it until she tells me later.

This is the first time that we’ve made it to the trigger shot and IUI. It’s hard to explain how exciting it is for me and my wife. Despite “trying” to create life for almost a year now, this is the first time it’s going to be biologically possible. In about 3 weeks we may actually have a pregnancy.

The type of excitement sort of reminds me how I felt a few weeks before our wedding. As the invitations were being sent out, playlists were being finalized. RSVPs starting come and everything else the wedding started to feel more “real”. While on TV this makes some guys get cold feet, it just made me excited and anxious, wishing that it could happen faster. That’s how I feel now, I just can’t wait for my wife to be pregnant and for this part of the journey to be over.

But, with that said, we both know that there are a ton of steps left before a small human being comes barreling out of my wife’s naughty bits. There are still a lot of things that need to work correctly for a pregnancy to actually take place. I’m not going to assume that everything is going to work perfect. But, god damn I’m ecstatic that we’re taking another step forward.

The trigger is Sunday, the IUI is Tuesday. For you, my intrepid readers, my thoughts on the IUI process, why it scares some men away, and the good/bad/ugly of doing your business in a sterile room with 2 year old playboys is coming up next.

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8 thoughts on “Onward, To The Great Unknown

  1. Never feel guilty about the positives! It gives us reader hope! So excited for you guys 🙂 My hubby would be the same way with the sex instead of intercourse, haha. That’s such a boring word. My thoughts are with your wife during the trigger shot and the days after. Eeee! Again, so excited!

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  2. Completely agree with Heather! I don’t know if this completely makes sense but for me there is a genuine happiness vs. jealousy when I see others with this struggle getting closer to becoming or actually becoming pregnant. I think it is just knowing how badly the child is wanted makes me happy. I can’t wait to follow and see the results, and will send positive vibes for a positive pregnancy test, and hopefully a happy & healthy pregnancy.

    I will also say that this part “a ton of steps left before a small human being comes barreling out of my wife’s naughty bits” made me literally laugh out loud. I love finding humor in the journey. Also I always think intercourse sounds so impersonal…haha not that sex sounds more romantic or anything.
    Wishing you the best of luck this coming week!

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